Your never ending gratitude speech

And why in the end, no one will truly gets to keep appreciations

We all might at some point have experience a commendable ‘high — point’ where everything seems to go well for us. Some of us say ‘Thank You’ at the good wishes while others get swayed and become complacent.

Regardless of your response, one cannot deny that it is worth taking a closer examination of why people are congratulating you. Is it because you successfully transmitted your knowledge and experiences to create appreciable results? Or instead, is it because you were lucky to be able to successfully tackle the hurdle you faced?

Consider you are one who cleared JEE and is now studying at an IIT. The whole world is celebrating for his success and journalists are lined up to get one line of motivation from you to publish it for aspirants to read.

At this juncture, it is worth introspecting to see how did you get here. Yes, it is due to hard work, determination and perseverance through several years. But I want you to look closer. If you do, you might see that:

• You received good education (or lacked one causing you to make do with what you can find)
• You had a good ecosystem (or lacked one causing you to try anything else to succeed)
• You were lucky to not give up and stay focused (or did not and cleared exam by fluke)

These are few of the many possible features that lead you to success. But think — do how much of the credit do you deserve? Think about that because:

• your education depends on your teachers
• your ecosystem depends on your peers
• your attitude depends on your upbringing and past experiences

So you gained energy from different sources and were able to translate that to your commendable result. So does not your teacher deserve some credit? If not for her, you probably would not have had such an outcome in the end. Or maybe you need to thank your supportive friends because otherwise, you would have found yourself stressed out far too often? Maybe your parents need to be applauded for bringing you to this point?

So as you can see, your appreciation is being transmitted to the original sources of energy that you gained from initially. So if your teacher has a big role to play in your success, I want you to think how did she become so capable? Yes, think about what factors made her a good teacher? Her tutors decades ago? Her peer group? Her upbringing?

Using principle of mathematical induction, you might be able to see how you will never truly deserve the credit others attribute to your success, because the truth is you are nothing but the result of your experiences, values and decisions. If you continue to re-transmit appreciation to your sources, and they to their sources, and so on, you will quickly realize how the world can be thanked for your success. Or if the math does not add up, there is another element playing a vital role in the background — completely invisible from the world. Maybe a God exists?

Or maybe you can look at it from the other extreme. maybe you should not re-transmit the appreciation you receive to the sources because your actions come from somewhere deep within your soul though it might have been externally nudged. In which case, you can take it all in and be happy. But from my limited time on this planet, I can say that systems that lack exchanges tend to exhaust out after a while. You might enjoy taking it all in but those who shaped your personality in to a winner will feel incomplete without your validation for their efforts. You see, re-transmission of emotion is a necessity for mankind to live collaboratively.

When people say ‘Joel, you are such a nice person’ I used to suck in all the good vibes. But lately I have observed how that made me arrogant or impatient as I started craving for more praises. When I started attributing it to others from my past, not only did my humility stay intact but also others in my network feel valued and validated.

Think of it as transaction with a different currency — emotions. Gratitude is you expressing your appreciation towards someone else. You can either stock in all up and feel over conscious about it. Or else, you can freely distribute it back to those who deserve and live calm.

To conclude, I would like to say that life is short and it is important to put a smile on as many people as you can. As poet Joseph Campbell says:

“To live in the hearts you leave behind is not to die”